Dear Parents,
When was the last time you thought about a guardrail? It's probably been a long time, unless you happened to run into one. But if you did run into one, what would you have hit without it there? Guardrails cost money to install and we don't want to put dents in our car, but they are usually in dangerous places. We use them in medians to keep us from straying into oncoming traffic, on bridges to keep us from falling into the water below, or on cliffs for the same reason. Sometimes we resent the guardrails in place to protect us, but in our hearts we know they are needed. Our church has a financial audit each year to make sure we are staying within the guardrails. It takes time and energy, but imagine the potential problems, if we failed to have this. Police make sure we follow, at least somewhat, the rules of the road. We may get nervous when we see flashing lights behind us, but imagine the road without police. You and I put guardrails in place for our children, and they too are sometimes resentful. They try to go around the rails or make deals with us to remove the rails. Instinctively they know these guardrails are for their own good. If we give in and remove the protective rails, we actually demonstrate our lack of love and concern. They make like it at the time, but it won't be long until they see how our weakness was really a failure to protect them. We need to think carefully about the guardrails we put in place for our children. Then stand firm. Blessings on your parenting, Tim Miesner
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Dear Parents,
We all encounter obstacles in our lives. The difference is whether we treat them as roadblocks or tollbooths. A roadblock does not allow us to continue, but with a tollbooth we continue at a price. A study of 415 top leaders found that 392 of them had suffered great difficulties along the way to where they are today. Far from being handed their prominence on a silver platter, these folks overcame problems that would have, and probably did, discourage many others. Nobody is guaranteed success, but everyone is guaranteed obstacles. The difference is how we handle them. Do we treat them as roadblocks or tollbooths? We need to teach our children that ability is not the key factor in success, persistence is. Encourage them to face problems on their own and push through them trying different solutions. They need to learn they can overcome obstacles. They may have to change or learn a new skill. After all there is a price for a toll booth. Never solve a problem (opportunity) for them. That would just be robbing them of a step in growth. Teach them to approach the issues of life not as roadblocks but as tollbooths, and encourage them to find a way to pay the toll and keep on moving. Blessings on your parenting, Tim Miesner Principal Dear Parents,
Have you experienced a flight delay? If you've flown commercially to any great extent, then you have certainly been subjected to the emotional whiplash of a delay. It serves to remind us how we are not in control of all aspects of our lives no matter how much we want to be. So how well did you handle the delay? Did you cry, get mad, blame someone, or complain to the ticket agent? Or did you just say that was to be expected occasionally? It is to be expected, and we should all know it, but managing those expectations is not easy for some of us. Yet, it's what emotionally healthy people do. On the other hand we don't want to be so passive that we just go through life letting things happen to us and setting no goals, having no drive. So how do we walk the line between those two extremes? It's not easy. We need to set goals to be successful, but when obstacles come up, we need to be flexible enough to change plans. How do we teach this difficult concept to our children? As you probably expected me to say by now, live it ourselves and they will too. This is an attitude that's "caught" not taught. When they see us adapt to the delays of life, they will assume the same attitude. So set aggressive goals, accept setbacks, and set new goals. Work hard but don't get bent out of shape if plans change. Blessings on your parenting, Tim Miesner Principal |
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